Dear Me in the Future

So this is a letter from me to me later in the future, that i a hundred percent believe would looking back into these old posts when got bored and smiling like an idiot when she read these thing all over again.

So first thing first, hi me!
Hope you make it, how's our life? let me guess, things work themselves out right? Are you okay? Maybe they didn't work out the way we expected how they must be, but can you think something better? Are you happy? Well, you have to be, it is the most important thing, isn't it?
Are they still there? I hope so. Who hold your hands now? How many friends did we made?
15years-old you a.k.a me, has so many questions about everything mostly about the future.
Do i have to worry about it? What should I do? Am i gonna regret something?

And despite my worries about the future,
are you still the same person with the person who write these words over here? Well, I'm not fully hope that you are and at the same time i hope you are. Please keep the good things from us and change the not-so-good things about us.
Hope you are not as insecure as you are now, it frustrates me, well, you know how it feels
Hope you are not so hard to talk to again, and stop being a damn-headstrong, you should listen to them sometimes to see the way.
Hope you make a good friends and get along with them.
How is the great big family? Please keep in touch with them, make them your top priorities. Take care of them all, please, you know that they loved you and I'm sure they are.
Get it all together, you will be just fine, please prove me that I'm wrong that i don't have to worry about it. God is always on our side, right?
And oh, i hope you still read your bible daily, don't you ever forget about Him. I bet there is a lot of changes on every little things. And hope its a good thing.

I just want to remind you, or us, that whoever you are today exactly at the moment you read this thing, its all because them, they loved you so much, and you owe them for the rest of your life, its your job to love them back without any limits, and to help them, take care of them, and be grateful because of them.

Read good books, make your own library in your dream house with him. Well i don't know who is the 'him' now but i believe it has been set perfectly by God. Hope you enjoy every little details of your life which means also my life, its ours.

Im enjoying my time now, God be with us<3

All of Me - John Legend lyrics

What would I do without your smart mouth?

Drawing me in, and you kicking me out

You've got my head spinning, no kidding, I can't pin you down

What's going on in that beautiful mind

I'm on your magical mystery ride

And I'm so dizzy, don't know what hit me, but I'll be alright

My head's under water

But I'm breathing fine

You're crazy and I'm out of my mind

'Cause all of me

Loves all of you

Love your curves and all your edges

All your perfect imperfections

Give your all to me

I'll give my all to you

You're my end and my beginning

Even when I lose I'm winning

'Cause I give you all of me

And you give me all of you, oh

How many times do I have to tell you

Even when you're crying you're beautiful too

The world is beating you down, I'm around through every mood

You're my downfall, you're my muse

My worst distraction, my rhythm and blues

I can't stop singing, it's ringing, in my head for you

My head's under water

But I'm breathing fine

You're crazy and I'm out of my mind

'Cause all of me

Loves all of you

Love your curves and all your edges

All your perfect imperfections

Give your all to me

I'll give my all to you

You're my end and my beginning

Even when I lose I'm winning

'Cause I give you all of me

And you give me all of you, oh

Give me all of you

Cards on the table, we're both showing hearts

Risking it all, though it's hard

'Cause all of me

Loves all of you

Love your curves and all your edges

All your perfect imperfections

Give your all to me

I'll give my all to you

You're my end and my beginning

Even when I lose I'm winning

'Cause I give you all of me

And you give me all of you

I give you all of me

And you give me all of you

Friday, I'm in love

It was friday, i just got back from hospital and i was so tired , and i was watching my most fav tv shows, Glee and i was so happy.

And he was there, sitting in silence beside of me while i was laughing and smiling because of Kurt Hummel, after all, i just don't know what to do, he seemed so quiet and i didn't know what's going on with him, and unfortunately I'm an insecure and a girl at the same time, so I'm just like enjoying my glee-time and i didn't have the courage to ask him what is wrong or anything. I was afraid it has nothing to do with me and i didn't want to bother him or anything with my weird questions, but yep i was wrong.

It was me. It was me that made him seemed so quiet.

'Can I tell you something?', he asked

He grabbed and held my hand so tight, i can still feel it, it was cold, and goddammit i couldn't help it, I was smiling like a happy 5years-old when she was being promised to go to the disneyland.

And oh please, I'm not that weird tho, I'm not gonna share the whole detail but, 

'.....you knew it, right? So?' he said, in the end.

And yes, i said yes.

----

"Let it be like they said it would be, me loving you girl, and you loving me
Am I unwise to open up your eyes to love me?

Run to me, whenever you're lonely. Run to me, if you need a shoulder. Now and then, you need someone older. Darling, you run to me" 

Its a lyric from the song that he sang that night to me. 

Thank you for asking dear.

And, the best thing of it all, it was him, he's my best friend. We've known each other for years. 

March is a blessing, my mom's operation went well, and hope she will be recovered soon.

Even tho im in my mid-term and its driving me like crazy but, still, Im in love

Wake Me Up When It's all Over

For seriously, I'm so tired of every single thing about school.
I need a 'plot twist'
I need a break
I need to breath
And we need to stop.

im so tired of people. I swear if puppy could talk i wouldn't make human friends ever again. Im tired of failing. I hate the fact that Im disappointing for some people. and I'm tired of being hurt, well i don't mean to give a damn with what people trying to say, but it just happened.

I'm getting tired of my own self.

School has took most of my precious time and life.

March started in a smooth-nice-not so amazing way, I went to the Java Jazz Festival 2014 on the second day and like we all know, it was awesomely awesome! Can't wait for the next JJFestival.

And for God sake, its almost 2am in the morning for seriously?!

Happy March people!