Underpressure

Pertanyaannya, kelas 9 ini kenapa begini banget? :'>
Orangnya capeq nih:)

I'm on my lowest point of life just like this last 2 weeks and don't know where the heck is the finish line.....
I have done my english paper just like 5 minutes ago. There's about 3 tasks to do, and too much pressure to face. I mean it's not only about the subjects even if i have to say it was 80% of the pressure i feel.
I don't wanna do my practical exam that obviously driving me crazy. I don't know what i'm doing..... it just feel like everything's happened in front of me and i have to follow the rhyme, no one will try to understand if i'm ready for it or something. I don't even know what i need or what i want

And be grateful is the hardest thing to do right now. Maybe this is the time people say that called the part of growing up, it's my time, and can i ask for more strength? Maybe that's what i need.